Looking back at the past months, 2019 have indeed been a good year so far. i am thankful beyond words seeing everything unfolding on its own. syukur alhamdulilah. Indeed, it was tough at the start.
I had trouble getting enough rest while juggling work and school. Whereas work, i had to take over the role of the head nurse and do almost everything from scratch but thankfully, the bosses rendered some help from the other branch so that i won't drown on my own.
The quiet support from the family and the little spark in me to somewhat prove to Mother that i am not totally a disappointment. I want her to see that i am able to stand on my own with my kids in tow and that i could do that with minimal help from the family.
And also, looking at how the relationship is progressing onwards with everyone's approval. We are just waiting till end of the year till we speak up and talk about marriage. Though, i believe my family is very well aware. I have minimal to worry about apart from the saving and the little 'moments' i tend to have.
I am alittle too insecure of other things that makes me a nerve-wreck. My ego is one of my weakness, that i have to admit that sometimes, i just don't wanna be the one who kinda does everything in a relationship yet i don't wanna voice out which in a way, hurt us for abit.
I need to better my relationship with Allah SWT and find peace within myself to be able to control my emotions and not react unnecessarily. And this is definitely a good month to start all over again, where i left off last year when i was broken-hearted. I believe i can make it a habit and a to do everyday.
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